Expressing yourself authentically on social media

A few suggestions, a handful of realizations, and some real life anecdotes on sharing on social media

Expression holds a bittersweet, tender spot in my heart. Precisely this is why I almost always teach on expression in one way or the other. I did a mindset workshop called ‘Free your Expression’ a few years ago (Drop me a DM on my Instagram, if you ever need it - it’s nomore on my shop, but I like to share it sometimes to those who may need it). This last year I held space for clients in my Brand expression session. This year, I have curated a specific recording of “Expression’ in my HD + Astro Recordings. Even in my 8 weeks containers, I offer space for exploration of expression - either personally or in your branding. (You can always book a free discovery call to explore this with me further xx)

This work is not just fun for me to blend the two worlds of writing, branding, and marketing with the mystical healing aspect of expression, astrology, and human design together, but it is also deeply moving and healing for my journey of expression.

To say that I am re-finding my expression at the moment would be quite an irony because every time we want to share and teach a subject, we are expected to be perfect in it. Whereas for me, almost the opposite happens. I sign up for teaching and then the Universe comes in to say, ‘okay, let us throw everything you knew around it and re-do it in a new way!’

So yes, expression is pretty hot for me right now. And like many many things in my life right now, including this business, and this work, I feel like I am starting from scratch again.

I am finding my voice again. I am finding my expression again. I am pondering and wondering, deeply and contemplatively, what I want to share with the world.

My whole inner world has transformed in the last few months and year.

And now my voice asks me, “what do we want to tell them?”

How do we want to be seen now?

What light and shade should I blend in to curate this new image…

And I say, “I don’t want to curate an image anymore!”

It’s the earthy Taurus season as I write this and I find myself thinking how easy it would be to not overthink your expression because your truth is your truth. Bending it, twisting it, making it sound different to appeal to certain sections - is it necessary? Who taught us this behavior? And why?

Because someone at one point told us that we are not enough just by standing in our truth?

That our truth needs a little bit of airbrush, a little bit of cosmetic, a liitle bit of artificial intelligence to seduce, to conceal and, to appeal.

The thing about earthy beauties is that they are raw. She smells of florals and cedarwoods not because it’s aesthetic but because she roams in the forest.

This is the barren truth and expression I am talking about.

The one which comes through our unique experience.

And you cannot make this up - no matter how hard you try.

I can dress up like a French girl and eat croissant one day for my feed, but I am not a French girl and I certainly do not live in France nor do I speak French and heck I definitely do not look like a French girl. I do not have the lived experience of a French girl. As the worlds have started to blend more thanks to the internet, I am witnessing French girls being just as human as this south asian indian girl with her own set of insecurities (do you know they have a Roman nose phenomenon and some french girls have grown up with insecurities around it but they’re now embracing it?) It baffles me how we pedestalize a type of woman, or human, and romanticize them and their life to escape our own authenticity and insecurity. Pretty much how women in the other parts of the world look at Indian women as exotic and beautiful but we have been sold fairness creams and hair straighteners.

Anyway, the thing about the traditional, commercialized definitions of branding, PR, and marketing is that they have been masters of illusions. They sold themselves on the pretext of creating illusions. It is absolutely an unapologetic sales pitch.

As a mutable in Astrology with a south node in Gemini, I know how to be that master. I know the mercurial art of painting a picture, the art of putting in the exact right shade and word to match up to present an image. I am a Virgo rising, you best believe I have lived a long time of my life living to the image of perfection.

However, this past year has taken the mask off and crushed all traces of facades and images. I stand naked in the truth of who I am sans projections and perceptions. It’s quite a confusing time of my life honestly because everything that I had so carefully curated for years stand in shambles and debris now. Everything I now wish to create is hardly rooting the foundation at the moment. I am in-between the spaces.

The last two months I have been partaking in an interesting social media experiment. Honestly, it was more of an astrology experiment.

So I have been posting more than usual (twice a day, 5 days a week) more on trends, more on what is quick, easy, and informative. The algorithm response to my experiment has been quite mixed which all the more makes me feel like there is no way to please the Instagram Gods, ha! On somedays, it’d make the silliest of reels go viral, on some days it’d make the most-on-vibe post go dead. On some days, it’d ghost my account and stories if I take a two-day break almost punishing me for resting or pausing. This is what I posted on my ‘gram the other day about this experiment.

I have been in a little #socialmedia experiment the past two months. It's been fun, it's been vulnerable and it's sometimes also been equally exhausting. The algorithm is made to give us the dopamine hit, that's for sure, until it takes it away to keep you starved and asking for more. While on some days, my venus in aries loved the dopamine game and played with reel challenges, on other days, I found myself drained and getting caught up in the web of curating, formatting, and masking to please the algorithm, even if unconsciously. When I look back, I observe i was most drained on days my expression was masked to match the feed, popular, trending, and 'what's working'. It's a very unconscious trip I didn't even realize but I was undertaking.. Well, pretty much a summary of how I've lived so much of my life. Nothing drains you like Masking.

Indulging in the social media game with hacks and tricks as a creator is not bad per se. It can be fun. It can also be very creative. In fact, it can be deeply healing for the inner child who craves to be seen at some point in our lives.

But at the same time, when the expression is not authentic of what's true for us and our values, suddenly nothing matters.

No algorithm, no likes, no DMs response, no dopamine hits or validation stand even close to the Satisfaction my soul seeks.

The pure satisfaction, or success or delight, or peace, of expressing your truth is unmatched.

I know we might be told that this is not what we are looking for as creators and business owners

But if that's true, why nothing is ever enough and why do we find ourselves continuously pressing Refresh and hungrily interrupting our real lives to create more - oh not more art, but more validation.

As creators, writers, artists, this is heaven and hell at the same time. How are you going to stay true to your expression without losing your voice in the crowd? Without conditioning, without influence?

My not-self sign ‘frustration’ showed up the moment I started disengaging from my real-life to spend more time online. (In human design, we all have a not-self emotion which shows up as a sign of non-alignment. New to Human Design? Get my HD Mechanics recording!)

It was subtle at first and then it went loud and louder.

This is when it hit me, this was never about social media, branding, or my business. This was about ‘expression’. And I mean we did talk about it in the Taurus season - of course, it had to show up.

And I love it when this happens in astrology. The way it humbles you down every single damn time. Yes, I have a Midheaven in Gemini but what I also have is a south node in Gemini. Yes, my mercury is in Pisces, but it trines Pluto in Scorpio too. Yes, I have a 12th house Leo, but Chiron is sitting here with open arms too. As much as pop astrology pushes it, you do not work with your placements exclusively.

Expression, or astrology, is not a straight line from A to B even though the digital world would want you to be convinced otherwise with its 8-step strategies and formulas. Expression holds charge. If it was ‘that easy’, there would not have been monumental revolutions for free Expression for centuries goneby.

Social media came in with the punch line of ‘fake it till you make it’ with highlights, aesthetic photography, aspirational lifestyle content and trending hashtags. But let’s admit, social media has become much more than what it aspired to be.

So if you’re someone who’s walking the thin rope of the paradox of being authentic on social media because you’re tired of masking every single day, these are some suggestions from me through my lived experience of finding my authentic expression on social media for the past ahem, ten years!

Authentic expression comes from authentic experiences

What I am realizing every day about my expression on social media first and foremost is to have a non-negotiable claim on my offline life. There is no creativity in scrolling and getting dopamine hits from watching other people’s content and thinking, ‘omg, this is so cool, let me make a quick post slightly inspired by this thing (read it: influenced)!’.

Now I am an avid reader and a very invested consumer of information and content. I do not want to sound like the influencers who have a count of 0 on ‘following’. I mean, that’s very arrogant and ignorant, in my opinion, to expect yourself as this self absorbed celebrity who is too busy to be invested in other people’s creations and offerings. That’s not my style. So, nope, I am not here to cancel consumption altogether. In fact, in human design, we often talk about how important it is for people with open or undefined head centers to gain inspirational and enriching content. As someone with an open head, I know how much I need that.

What I am talking about is the process of creating online for online from online.

This is where we lose our authenticity, our integrity and our original spark.

This is where everyone’s feed and posts start looking one shade, one colour, one voice. Flat. Dead. Dull.

and most importantly, nothing of your own?

I think we often forget when we are creating on social media that the creation is the output of our experiences and journeys. We get so lost and fazed in the noise of do it, do it, do it this way, that way, that we forget to take the journey that will lead to these authentic expressions.

If your ideas are not coming from something you experienced in your offline, real life, we don’t need a rinse and repeat to satisfy the what- algorithm? This is bad journalism. This is lazy journalism. This is the journalism I refused to be a part of after my first job where I had to re-do the same viral information in a new packaged format. It was boring, and useless.

I am talking about slow, conscious, authentic expression.

The kind of expression that reminds me of an internship experience when I went to a press conference and interviewed two mountaineer sisters in real life way before it was broadcasted to the world. The thrill, the pride and the inspiration I felt meeting them, speaking to them, and drafting their courageous story. As I write this, I am realizing why it was ever a dream career for an 18-year-old Shivani to share stories.

Is there space for this kind of expression on social media right now?

Well, it depends what are you looking for on social media.

If you’re looking for vanity numbers and metrics, maybe not.

If you’re looking for community, resonance, belonging, or just the liberation of being yourself, maybe this is what you should pick.

None guarantees success or money 100%, trust my lived experience. But one definitely guarantees the deep-seated satisfaction of being true and authentic. (Plus, a little sales secret, people are more inclined to buy from you when they resonate with you).

Healing your wounds around self-expression before outward expression through astrology and conscious healing

What often happens when we jump in to claim our expression online is that the vulnerability, shame, and fear creeps in and overwhelms our system that has been hijacked to keep us away from our liberated forms of self-expression. This happens because our relationship with our own self-expression is still standing unclaimed. We cannot share what we haven't integrated ourselves. What is your expression like when no one is watching? How do you express your desires, passions, creativity, and feelings? Where does it come from? Do you dance? Do you cook? Do you write love sick poetry? Do you cry? Do you fantasize? Do you dig rabbit holes when you feel the hunger? Do you converse with the Universe? What do you do FOR YOUR OWN SELF EXPRESSION?

Until we make peace with our own self-expression, our outward expression will always be a means to please. In astrology, 5th house is where I find a lot of scope for this work around self-expression.

The 5th house is ruled by Leo. Leo is proud, unapologetic and a true individual being. Leo is the naked child out in the sun in tarot. Unperturbed, unbothered by its nakedness. Which sign you have 5th house in as well as planets in that house can tell you a lot about our relationship with your self-expression. Once you have that information, you can work consciously to release shame and integrate your self expression in your everyday life. For example - I have a 5th house Capricorn with Uranus + neptune in it. Naturally I express my creativity through the internet (Uranus rules technology) as of now. But for years, when i did not, when my creativity was blocked, I was hooked on to unhealthy relationship dynamics. I had to work through finding my unique voice and creative expression so that I do not fall for the illusions of Neptune via unconscious and unhealthy dating patterns to seek validation for my expression. There has been a lot of healing in this regard as I focussed more on integrating my spiritual and psychic gifts. Both of these conjunct in Capricorn also reflect how so much of this shame comes from traditional religious and patriarchal conditioning to embrace my feminine interests and creativity.

This is truly the medicine for healing the shame around being seen and being fully expressed before you go out to share your expression and seek validation.

Take social media breaks to come back to yourself

I agree social media is not very happy when we take social media breaks. Everytime I have taken an Instagram break, it felt like starting back from scratch, not just in terms of the algorithm but also in my own personal momentum. But then, I had to remind myself about my deep desire to tap into my authentic expression over the artificial desire to become popular.

It’s always an enriching journey to savour the quiet moments of being away from social media. When I was going through the worst panic attacks and mental health issues last year, I started these rituals of social media breaks for the first time in my life. I noticed the sheer quietness in my mind when I went on walks or read a book instead of scrolling through. I will admit it was difficult at first and it made me realize how addicted I have been to the socials all my life (these neptune transits have exposed every bit of my addiction!). But at the same time it also made me feel so good that I started questioning if I want to be there at all? Of course, if I am writing this article after 10 months, you know I decided to stay. And to stay, I had to impose certain healthy boundaries. Like two days break, a weekly break and so on...

Windows of reflection on your expression

Sometimes we can get lost in the race on social media. We can feel trapped and always two steps behind no matter what we do. It is imperative to take a moment to see and celebrate how far you’ve come - and no I don’t mean that in terms of checking social media analytics, yikes, I thought you knew me better, hehe. I mean celebrate how far you’ve come to drop pretense, to pick up courage, to have the bravery to be seen, I am talking about the spiritual progress of no more hiding. It is also imperative to have an honest check-in if your expression aligns with your values. Needless to say, if you practice conscious breaks and pauses, you’d always know if you’re aligned or if you’re simply rushing to the goal post - which, breaking news, does not exist on social media.

Your creation is a ritual, treat it as such

The best way to know that you’re running ahead of yourself is when you are more excited about how your work will be received than the actual process of creating it. Now ofcourse it is natural for us to want our work to be seen. But we give away our power and dilute our expression when we rush it to ‘publish’ and ‘post’. As an emotional authority in Human Design, it’s been a healing journey to not rush but to romance with the process of ‘it takes as long as it takes’.

If your process of writing or editing or putting together ideas in an Instagram reel is not satisfying (for generators and mani gens in HD), peaceful (for manifestors) or delightful (for reflectors), or maybe feels like ‘success ‘ already (for projectors), then it’s a telltale sign that something is off.

If there’s one thing I’d tell myself looking back and something I knew would ease my anxiety everytime I wanted to post, it’d be “it takes as long as it takes”.

Follow accounts from varied industries instead of over-consuming from that of your own

This is something so common. It happens to me all the time because that’s how our subconscious mind as well as the algorithm is designed. It’s hard not to get influenced to create the same type of content because you think it’s working for them so it’d work for me too. This mind is tricky to beat. The moment I integrate astrology in my work, bam! I am following all the astrologers! And, because I have been here for a while, I know how it happens each time. Five years ago I just had zillions of people teaching the law of attraction and manifestation on my feed because I was doing the same thing. I kind of fell in the same trap here on substack too.

Until I consciously decided to follow sourdough bakers, and watercolour artists, just with the same enthusiasm. It is not just joyful to following these variety of accounts but also inspirational and juicy for my creativity to see them explore life through a different medium. It asks me to think differently about my content.

Make your natal chart your anchor to come back to

Okay, obviously I love astrology and human design - but why? Because of this. It is an anchor to come back to. Both of these systems work on our birth signatures and hence, no matter what, they’d never change. They are a blueprint of who I am. It’s like a diary kept safe in your drawers you could return to everytime you forget the recipe. Returning to my natal chart and my human design reminds me of how my energy is naturally designed to flow and if I am aligned to that natural ebb and flow or if i am being distracted and confused - both of which happen quite often with my ADHD-like Mani-gen brain. I have a foundational workshop on how to read your natal chart if you’re an absolute beginner, check this out.

Releasing shame in our throat chakra with the somatics

Trauma gets stored in our soma (body) and blocks the flow of energy. The throat is where we manifest from, energetically as well as physically. So when our throats carry this stagnant energy, it blocks the energy flow. Ofcourse this blocked emotion can stem from trauma, suppression, ancestral wounds, and so much more.

Most of my migraine episodes have stemmed from this stagnant blocked energy in my throat and heart. What has deeply supported my throat chakra healing has been breathwork and vocal toning. Both are lovely tools to work with on a regular basis not just for your throat chakra to unblock but also for your nervous system to feel resonance with expressing itself freely. Both are so rebellious for women because we live in a society that is not very open to women expressing themselves through their voices. When you’re expressing yourself on social media, your deepest wounds on expression come up simply because they exist collectively and well, social media is a very public, collective place. There is a flat obedient note that is reserved for good women and anything below or above is provocative, seductive or derogatory.Be it moaning, be it screaming, be it whispering - every bit of throat expression carries with it the subsequent shame of not being a good woman.

When you indulge in any of these healing practices your throat chakra you are granting yourself big permission slips to be whole in your existence, and consequently, your expression. (I am super excited to be bringing to you a curated course course on these healing practices very soon. Meanwhile, here are my meditations for you to meditate on incase you didn't know I offer them on Insight Timer for free)

I hope these suggestions brought you some perspective to share your voice and your art on social media in impactful and authentic ways. These are ‘suggestions’ based on my personal experiences so as always, practice your inner authority to choose the ones which you resonated with the most :)